Thursday, February 4, 2010

Putting Our Houses in Order

"Sarah died in Kiriath-arba - now Hebron - in the land of Canaan; and Abraham proceeded to mourn for Sarah and to bewail her." (Genesis 23:2)

Yesterday's reading - the 'Akedah (or "the binding of Isaac") - is one of the most intense chapters in all of Scripture; one that has generated much conversation and debate and ink. For me Soren Kierkegaard's brilliant analysis in Fear and Trembling remains the most profound reflection on that chapter I've ever come across. But I also remember Will Willimon noting in his haunting and inimitable way (I paraphrase, from memory) - "at least Abraham was willing to sacrifice his kid to YHWH; how many of us sacrifice our kids to far lesser gods?"
Today's Old Testament reading (from the Daily Office) is the 23rd chapter of Genesis, a chapter that no doubt has gotten far less attention from scholars, preachers, and ordinary believers than the 22nd chapter. But I wonder if it doesn't deserve at least a bit more notice and attention. The note in my Jewish Study Bible simply says this: "after the climactic episode of the 'Akedah, all Abraham's actions are in the nature of putting his affairs in order. In chapter 23 he acquires a burial plot for Sarah. In the next chapter he arranges for a wife for Isaac and in chapter 25 he decrees the distribution of his assets and passes away."

Abraham goes about the work of "getting his house in order." It sounds simple enough; we are all dust and to dust we shall all return. Yet as a pastor I'm amazed at how many loose ends--unnecessary loose ends, so many people leave when they die. It is as if they think they will be the first human ever to live who will cheat death, although I'm quite sure it's not quite that conscious. It's one thing if someone dies suddenly and unprepared in their twenties or thirties; quite another thing when people are in their sixties or seventies or eighties and still unwilling (or unable) to contemplate their mortality.

I got a call from a woman about two weeks ago who wanted to talk about her mother's burial. It's not that unusual for me to get that kind of call, but what made this call unusual is that her mother has not yet died. She does have terminal cancer and is already on "borrowed time" but nevertheless the request was not to show up and do a funeral for someone I never met, but an invitation to visit her mom and talk about the options and her desires. Since receiving that call I've visited with mother and daughter together and a second time to take her mom Communion, and we have discussed plans to anoint her before her final breath, hopefully with her children gathered around her. She is one of the many people I meet who are "people of faith" even if they are not "church people." Yet it is quite rare to meet someone who has that kind of clarity and wisdom about "putting her house in order." It is, I believe, one of the most important gifts a person can give to their children and grandchildren.

I know that the prayer I learned as a child has gone way out of fashion: "...if I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to keep." I'm told that is scary for children. I guess I'm liberal enough to appreciate that, but curmudgeonly enough to wonder who is really scared of that prayer--the child or the parent? We have raised a generation or more of people who live in denial of death, and denial of death keeps us from making funeral plans and wills and living wills and all of the rest. It keeps us from making sure our houses are in order. I give thanks for the 23rd, 24th, and 25th chapters of Genesis and for those who bear witness to faithful living and dying.

No comments:

Post a Comment